Googlerific

I still wish I had saved a picture of the Google image gone wrong.  It was somewhere in the range of Valentine’s Day 2007, and I was working out the unnecessarily large office that Russ Marshalek, and I were in, while working out the opening plans for Wordsmiths.  Anyway, Google, who is prone to wild image reconstruction of their logo, in order to make them seem more holiday friendly, and, well, I don’t know…shoppable?  They had dolled it up nice, with hearts, and arrows, and prettified it quite nicely.  Unfortunately, they had forgotten the, “L,” thereby forever re-branding them in my head as, “Googe.”

Such is the way.

That said, there’s really nothing better than Google.  No, really, I mean that; and please, do, take into account my ever-publicized love of cheese.  I’m really throwing myself out there on this one.  Seriously, a slab of cheddar will make my day, no matter the mood, but can cheese really bring the sudden, and decisive, joy that Googe…I mean, Google, can?

For example, let’s see cheese do this:

Um…how about…”monkey fish banana wrapper”?

Suddenly I’m Monkeying Around the World, learning how to make Fish Tacos & Wanton Wrapper Tarts, discovering the joys of bananas, and breaching the walls of  Bat Conservation International, where I can find out whether or not bats can save bananas (I am duly shocked to note that there is some fear that bananas are threatened in some way…my Raisin Bran will never be the same!).  All of this new information in my life, that I would never have even thought to search, had I not type a random sequence of words (albeit good ones!) into the Google filter.

Let’s see what else we get.

A little more tricky, and apropos to my nefarious career as a purveyor of Devil Fiction: “Church algae tommyknocker sponge.”

Which nets me: The true history of the Scots, some site that references “Biscuits & Jam,” and all the reason you will ever need to buy your girlfriend a Wii Fit.  That last one’s pretty random.

Ok, so it’s hit or miss.  What isn’t hit or miss is Google’s Translating site, named cleverly enough, Translate Google.  This is just hours worth of fun on Facebook (or emails, if you want to confuse your Fantasy Baseball compatriots) waiting to happen.  Because it can detect the language for you (just copy and paste it in), there’s plenty of entertainment to be had with one, or more, of your friends (or yourself if it’s just you, and some cheese dip for the night).  It’s always fascinated me how English translates into other languages.  It’s kind of eye opening to see it, and begin to understand why there’s such a gap between foreigners, and our ability understand their version of English.  It make sense of Engrish, to be honest.  Just pick a language, and a common English phrase, and see how, “Can you please clock me in?” becomes a suggestion that someone has attempted to steal your watch.

Feel free to test it out on my Facebook page, if you’re bored.  I usually am.

I’ll have Jesus Christ Vampire Hunter in hand tomorrow, so somewhere between my laughter, and my attempts to caffeinate myself into believing Wednesday is really happening, I’ll make sure to review it.  It should be colossal.

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